Matters of the Heart
When the heart hurts, everything hurts
Somatic pain exists; the heartstrings are tearing, when the heart is breaking.
Matters of the heart….
It is hardest subject to deal with. Anything that touches the heart then ends up hurting the heart hurts to the core. The heart it the hardest thing to repair.
Once damaged, it takes time to begin to repair. The most important part is WHO hurt your heart. We sometimes entrust our hearts to those that we feel we should…those that we think are supposed to love us. In essence, no one is supposed to love us. No one has to love us.
Matters of the Heart…
When the heartstrings are bent,
One is left in a state of disbelief; our heart is one thing that is irreplaceable. Even if we had a heart transplant, our heart still would not be the same because it is not OUR original heart. Just as you are never the same after a heartbreak. The person that hurts you is not the same, even after forgiveness, you never view them the same. They are not the original person and their love is never the “original love”.
You cannot replace feelings of nothingness with feelings of wholesomeness as they relate to matters of the heart. Pain is something that cannot be put into words. You learn to cope. You learn to guard your heart. You learn what the ultimate betrayal feels like but you never get over ultimate betrayal. You just learn how to make sure you are semi-prepared for it if it happens again because you do not expect anything from anyone. You learn that love is not what you thought it was. You learn that matters of the heart keep you fighting a battle. It is like you make sure you have battle clothes on as you are always up against the sinister. They ease their way in, attempting to be something they are not while you are all about making sure your heart is protected.
Hidden agendas, deceit, lies, controversy, manipulation, all of it is a process to destroy and keep you off balance when really, it keeps you balanced because it keeps you prepared for battle. Matters of the heart, they are never simple. It is not as simple as going out getting a tune up for your car but then deciding you don’t want a tune up, you want another car. Matters of the heart are so complicated. You are not able to trust as you should. You are not able to love as you should. You are not able to be, as you should because of this thing called, LIFE.
The ultimate betrayal prepares you for life, in a way like nothing else does. It awakens your senses. It allows you to see everything for what it is. It allows you to see people for what they are. It allows you to better evaluate yourself. It allows you to learn to be comfortable, being uncomfortable. It allows you to realize your worth and add a few million to it. It allows you to realize that for everything there is a season and that timing is everything. It allows you to treasure time alone and be thankful for those that have been consistent. Thus, consistency is the key.
Matters of the heart….the lessons you learn about those that you tried to hold on to, yet they did not hold on to you. Instead, they betrayed you to save themselves. Matters of the heart, this life was given to me for a reason, many reasons. Even though, according to what I have been told, someone has resented me since in the womb. However, another loved me and I was born anyway. I have meaning. I have purpose. Matters of the heart, I have seen people commit crimes and get away with it. They have slick bragged on it and think it is okay. Arrogance and Narcissism but the thing is God knows. Nevertheless, sometimes crimes are committed and people die behind them but thing is, His will shall be done. I am not perfect. I do not proclaim to be. However, He does put things on my heart. The ultimate betrayal affects the heart…I can write a book on this and hopefully I will soon. Everyone isn’t going to love everyone. Translation: Everyone isn’t going to love me. I love myself. My Creator loves me. Judgments by people are just that, judgments from mere humans.
“If I lost everything and didn’t have anything, and you were the only thing, I’d still have everything. You are my everything. I’d still have everything”–Bri